resolution

Resolute in:
my voice
my heart
my vision

Resolute with:
my words
my service
my integrity

Resolute to:
make waves
ask questions
not diminish

Resolute by:
asking for more
receiving more
trusting more

Being resolute in myself:
strong feet in December waters
ocean child at heart
worshipper of growth and change
🌌🌌🌊🌊🌄🌄🌿🌿

spread and purpose

Here's the deal: the business started because I wanted high quality nutritionally dense baked goods that accommodated MY digestive issues

I have Celiac Disease so gluten is the obvious. The other intolerances I had were to dairy (gut) and eggs (skin). My baked goods, and the way I bake, was born through that exploration and through those restrictions

I'm not one to ever question the scaffolding that people have established in their lives-- this shit is hard and we're all doing our best. I don't need justification to see that they walk in integrity. I believe they do 🤷‍♀️ I have compassion for where they're at-- whether it looks like hypocrisy to others or not, it's not up to me to be part of the call out-- ESPECIALLY when it relates to what they eat

Moving through this life has shown me that EVERYONE is working with what they have in front of them. Most of us are trying to pull ourselves up and out of our shit

I pulled myself back from the edge of disease at a time when food was an enemy. Every single thing I put into my body was causing system-wide reactions, I never thought I would have a normal and balanced diet. I lived in pain everyday from 16 to 24 with no guidance and answers

Through listening to and understanding my body, things started to fall into place and my gut began to heal

THIS ☝️ is the core principle of Happy Belly: bring yourself back into balance by occupying a place of listening and responding

In pregnancy/postpartum my body craves dairy and meat. I lean in, listen to the call, trust the intuition. My nervous system comes into balance. I thrive. I eat mostly plants, but I definitely listen when my body says "it's time to eat some meat" #intuitiveeating

If you have an issue, it's your shit-- but I'm here and open to talk

You haven't existed in my body 🤷‍♀️ you haven't navigated my disease 🤷‍♀️ you don't know what feels right for me 🤷‍♀️ #bioindividuality

Listen to your self. Stop shaming others for things that work for them. All that negative talk is a heavy weight to live with. We are all doing our best.

And, yeah, I cook vegan and eat meat

I am human. Complex, contradictory, and completely fine holding space for it all

feeling my people

Feeling my people tonight and the magical spaces they occupy 🌌🌈 spaces where time collapses and expands. Spaces where we all dance together in spirit completely enraptured within the grace and design of the Universe

We see

The wild woman in me sings. My bones ache for my return to the land of my ancestors. To strip my feet bare and come home. To feel my heart break open to it all and finally be able to rest in the womb of the earth

I am of the people who would not succumb. The ones who could not be tamed. Their painted faces, their war drums, their midnight incantations, their distant dreams embody me. Their fire always burns and I always tend

Even in our darkest days we cannot be broken, they say. Rest yourself in the depth of moon tonight, they say. Have no fear and be in love, they say

I say
We rise

build a family

I made chocolate because fuck man!!! I'm sad, running a business is hard, and this is how I process

It requires insanely thick skin AND an open heart-- the ULTIMATE tightrope

The game is definitely changing because our paradigm is shifting but weathering the storm right now is like being stuck under water and barely surfacing to breathe

This has been the year of starts and stalls on major projects. Projects that would have put us on bigger stages working in conjunction with visionary people

Things that I have dreamed of for YEARS. Things that seemed like they were coming to fruition, eventually had to be put to bed because circumstances weren't aligned in the healthiest of ways

In the 7 years I've been doing this I've seen a lot of people come in and out of the entrepreneurial game

It's a fast growth path and it's not for everyone

Want to work on yourself in the most intensive of ways? Start a business and have it be your solo gig

You're constantly confronting all of your own shit. And it's plainly obvious because all your shortcomings become massive obstacles that start effecting your bottom line

Personal development is part of the deal to this version of freedom. You have to be with yourself all the time. BIG lessons on self-love and acceptance

We hear that to succeed you need to fail. But in practice, and especially with a livelihood on the line, that is so hard to come up against every single day. I have doubts all the time. I think of closing up shop all the time. But I'm still here, creating... because that's who I am

This is the year of purged dreams and brokenhearts. But, as I was reminded last night, I've been through a lot worse 😏 I'm trusting what my dad used to say: out with the old, in with the new

I'm grateful for the new vision that is coming in but I'm also grieving my losses

I'm thankful for the people who are on this path with me right now. The ones who are keeping me dreaming and helping me envision a more interesting future for myself, my family, and my business 🙌🙌❤❤

Biggest lessons of 2019: GRIEVE and PIVOT! Goal for 2020: SUPPORT and BUILD A "FAMILY"

deep contractions

🤲🌈 the entrepreneurial spirit is alive and well in Puerto Rico 🤲🌈 guys selling newspapers and bottled water on the side of the road; abuelas selling their pastries on the beach; a guy who was carrying his piano and selling songs to fund college; the hilltop restaurants attached to family homes that are open with live music, food, and drinks just on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday (when it works for them!)
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Being among all that vision and drive--- and in the most straightforward and honest of ways: THERE IS A NEED--- put so many things about business into perspective

Maybe this is all too much to share on our IG 🤷‍♀️ but whatever, you guys have been with me on this ride for 7 years and taking in HB magic every week

Food (and fucking life!) is so intimate. Thinking that we have to separate the person from the profession, to make it more palatable, is ridiculous. We need more sharing. More reflections of REAL reality

I've been in a place of deep contraction for a while.

I haven't asked the whys and hows of it all, I'm just sitting in it and letting it take shape. Somehow trusting that it will all emerge as something that I can actually work with

I do know that so much of the contraction has to do with settling into being a mother and mothering

The figuring out of what works brings me to a place deep within myself where everything gets questioned. And, if I'm being honest, thinking about the business as my baby has been bringing me there too

I'm really trying to understand what is working, what isn't working, what is actually good for me, and what is actually good for my family

This time last year, someone told me to figure out the foundation for my life and build the business on top that. The business can pivot and readjust, but the foundation will always be what you can come back to for stability

This year has been that. Figuring out my foundation

So seeing something in myself that I see in these people--- maybe the scrappiness and dedication it takes to reach out to others WHILE pulling yourself up?--- hit me hard.

It's undefinable right now, but the spirit of it is definitely sitting in my heart (just waiting to take shape 🇵🇷🌈🐎⛰)